Avoid Ebbing Old Age for Better Social Life

Having coffee with my dad one morning, he told me about senior years. This was his take: 

Aged wine rings a nice bell to us who appreciate wines. "Do you drink?" my dad asked. (Before I could say anything, he went on). I still do, on special occasions and after heavy meat dinners. Aids digestion. I love red wine and other fruit wines. I recommend mangosteen and strawberry. Oh and yeah, some sips of cold beer, too.

Photo by Laura Margarita Cedeño Peralta on Unsplash.

(I remember my friend and college batchmate, Jun, recommends a small measure of rhum in coffee. Does wonders, he says. Haven't tried it yet. Tomorrow, probably).

(Dad went on). Anyway, human aging is supposed to be like aging wine--getting better as the years pass. I call it graceful aging. It's by God's grace, mind you. You get wiser and smarter (they say wise is better than smart. I say they go hand in hand as you age), more disciplined and patient, quieter, more broadminded, happier, simpler and obviously more contented. Humbler, most importantly. All the positives in their comparative degree. Life is supposed to have taught you well. In Tagalog, "merong pinagka-tandaan."

But there's the complete opposite, which I call ebbing old age. Your character traits are also in the comparative degree but all negative. Crankier, grumpier, more impatient, more unruly, incredibly more narrow-minded, more toxic, nosier, more miserable, more complicated, harder to please, demanding more attention, and becoming more arrogant, especially. Sometimes, more sexually malicious even (dad frowned as he said that). A difficult person to the nth degree. 

In Tagalog, it's "tumatanda ng pa-urong," or "pasaway. Old people who've gained a lot of head knowledge, seen a lot, and yet learned nothing. "It's not senility, dementia, or anything like that," dad emphasized. It's character and moral decline. Old folks having second childhood experience are better off than they are, dad opined. You may have dementia and yet be the sweetest person on earth. On the flip side, you may be free from memory loss and yet accumulate nothing mentally but negative vibes. 

"Walang pinagka-tandaan," dad added after sipping his coffee.

"How do you stay out of it?" I asked. 

He said this:

Nothing beats the bible when it comes to character and attitude molding. Personality development. Live by the good life patterns you see in the bible. I'm not saying be more religious or churchy. Religion and church often are the culprits. You'd find the worst hypocrisy there. Not all of them, though, mind you. The thing is to study the bible and ask God to guide you. He will. He's the Author of graceful aging, so you'd be sure to get his kind response and help. Nothing arrogant or pompous about him. He longs to help. 

Now, don't get me wrong. Just because you read the bible, doesn't mean you age gracefully. It depends on how you take God's Word. Is the bible mere history to you? Just stories? Records? Philosophy? Something you can critique, appraise, find fault with, deprecate, or judge the way you do other books? Then, like ebbing old age, all you get is head knowledge and yet learn nothing.

But if you see it as God's own Word, believe and confess it with your heart, and apply, then you're sure to age gracefully. In a gist, you become quieter, simpler, humbler and happier.