Eating with the Stingy

They're not just tightfisted, they're scheming. Actually, they seem generous but don't let that decorative veneer fool you. It's going to cost you sooner or later. You'd pay back every cent--if you let them. And it seems that almost everyone is stingy--or is it just me imagining things? [Image above by Joe Green, Unsplash].

Sometimes I check myself thoroughly and see if I'm just being so paranoid with being a nonjoiner--or seeing wrong in almost everybody else but me. Sometimes I catch myself being like that and redress, but at times, too, I see I'm right. After considering things and my thoughts a good while, I decide that I'm right and put it in writing on one of my blogs. And yup, a lot of folks are stingy.

And it's not just about literally counting the cost of how much you eat when they invite you over for dinner (and I'm so susceptible since I love to eat). They also count the possibility of controlling or owning you after. They let you eat and then take control of your life. Here's how Proverbs 23 puts it:

Do not eat the food of a begrudging host (or stingy person), do not crave his delicacies; 7 for he is the kind of person who is always thinking about the cost. "Eat and drink,” he says to you, but his heart is not with you. 8 You will vomit up the little you have eaten and will have wasted your compliments.

Earlier it said:

3 Do not crave his delicacies, for that food is deceptive.

Almost everything good is deceptive these days. People show you affection, concern, love, pity, sympathy, compassion, etc. and then later you discover it was done with ulterior motives.  It's either to control or use you. I've seen it too often to make me decide that majority of people are really stingy. They won't give anything without getting something in return. It's sure ball.

Beware when people get too nice. First, they invite you to eat. They put the best food and desserts on the table. When you have had a few spoonfuls, they ask you about your work, marriage, family life, religious or politic belief, etc. Anything they hear that they don't agree with they correct and re-define for you--and they want you to swallow it whole down your throat. No ifs or buts. You have to see everything their way--especially after you finish your meal and burp.

And it's not limited to food or meal offers. It can take other forms. Like, if they gave you a free ride on their car, paid for your fare, offered you a job, did you a favor, gave you a compliment, or treated you for coffee. Salesmen and network marketers often do it. They act super nice to let your guard down so they can do a sales presentation.

Church does it, too. They offer help after calamities or act extremely nice because they plan to make you a member--or start a work at your home or place. Jesus never did that. He helped people and left them behind. He fed the 5,000 and then sent them home--without even telling them to come back next Sunday. One man he healed of demon possession begged to go with him but he turned him down.

Today, it's become normal to be stingy. Church thinks it's good and made it their SOP. They never give you anything without asking something in return. They dole out goodies but get your name, address and contact number for "follow up" later. Follow up is a good euphemism for getting something in return. It's an investment rather than a genuine show of concern.